This chronicles the debacle that was Oktoberfest 2008.
Thanks to Alan M for the idea of the trip, thanks to Damien for
the hilarity, thanks to Maurice (Mossie - Pussy) for the 'craziness',
thanks to Dave for his ridiculous way of making a party happen,
thanks to Liam (Willy) for stories I couldn't understand, and thanks
to Jeanna for taking a detour on her work travels to class up our debauchery.

Folks, let me know if you want any of these removed for any reason
and I'll offer it up for a vote to those present... Videos at the bottom of the page


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M and I went for pints at a old monastery in Cork before heading off the Munich.
About the only good decision we made this weekend was getting a good night's sleep before
hopping on the plane.

Day 1 - The Madness


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This was the first scene I had walking into Oktoberfest. I LOVE ze bretzels!!


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Jeanna Berg and an amazingly large female statue.


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Our first views of the beer tents. At this point, we were scared to death that we wouldn't
get a beer at all for all of Oktoberfest. The frantic hunting genes started to set in...


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The rotating beer on the Paulaner tent made me smile all weekend.


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Human Population Density = too many, as we're trying to negotiate a drink. "You must be ze sitting
down to get ze beer!"


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I liked this house a lot.


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The world needs more accordion players. I put money into every busker's bin who was playing
an accordion throughout the weekend.


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I'm guessing they served fish.


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Front of the Pschorr house.


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Our first pints. We were SOOO stoked! Damien gave a 50 to a barmaid and just HOPED we'd get beer
and she wouldn't just run off. I said "Damien, how did you know she even worked here?" He goes,
"Well, she had a dress on..." Thankfully, it worked out.


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Jeanna enjoying the big wiener.


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Alan and Maurice (henceforth referred to as Pussy" nibbling each other's wiener.


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Jeanna and I at Oktoberfest, Munich, Germany, 27 Sept 2008.


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Jeanna stole this guy's hat and then said, "Hey, come here and take a picture!" This should
totally be Jeanna's new facebook photo.


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I took this for my friend Jordan since he's a fan of Gogol Bordello.


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These were our new friends for the night - Daniel and his wife Kirsten. We are trying to convince
them to move to Calgary. Welcome to Canada!


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We had a contest going about who could get the most ridiculous picture of them with a male German.
This guy sold me a pickle for 2 Euro and I think Jeanna wins the contest with this photo.


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However, I laughed pretty hard when I saw this guy. Talk about not even trying to look her in the eyes!


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Pussy, Jeanna, and Damien playing with their phones. It turns out that no one in Ireland
uses a flip phone since they're considered "femmy".


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Kirsten and some drunken German guy (not her husband).


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I really like the big star logo of Pschorr.


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Jeanna, Kirsten, Damien, and another new friend.


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Jeanna and Daniel dancing on the tables. It seems like EVERYONE dances on the tables in Munich.
However, Damien should be banned since I think he caused pain to everyone by falling off the tables.


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Jeanna and Damien shortly before Damien ate it.


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It's difficult in a single photo to do justice to the sheer madness that is Oktoberfest.
Imagine many 1L steins of 6.9% "special Oktoberfest" beer, ~ 10,000 people per tent, and
a big band in the centre of every tent, and nothing but good times erupts. The origin of the
festival is in King Ludwig's wedding celebration and if my wedding is ANYTHING like this,
I will be THRILLED!!


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Me, looking down onto a table of steins.


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Daniel and I having a blast.


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Jeanna, Kirsten, and some random.


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The drunk Italian in the foreground is typical of the festival that weekend since it was "Italian
Weekend" and all of Italy makes the 10 hour drive north.


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Dave finally made a showing to the festival having routed himself via Dublin. By the time he got to
Oktoberfest, it was just in time to NOT get served and so we went for a tour out to eat somewhere.
He claims I was pretty glued that night, but I don't believe it for a minute.

Day 2 - The Craziness


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We decided to take a tour to Marienplatz so that we wouldn't start
our Sunday drinking too early. I will note that I have never felt as bad the morning after as I did
on this day. After a heroic amount of beer and no water, my liver simply gave up and starting to
smash its way out of my body through my skull. This is the Glockenspiel at the old town hall
in Munich and it's one of my favourite buildings in Europe. It's also the reason I'm now
the proud owner of a Black Forest cuckoo clock.


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A better shot of me, but it doesn't show the rotating people.


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The Glockenspiel in all of its splendor.


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Alan M wandering around downtown Munich.


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I took this picture for Natalia since she had apprenticed in a German bakery. Yes, I would be
a giant fat mess if I lived in Munich permanently.


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We decided coffee in an outdoor cafe was a great idea but it was too cold. No problem says M
and Pussy - we'll just snuggle under this blanket.


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Jeanna also appreciated the blanket.


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The man's German garb. I guess in most cases, they're handed down through the generations.
I think it's a brilliant idea, but you can't wash the leather. So, you'd be married in your
grandfather's liederhosen that haven't ever been washed... Yeah, my thoughts too.


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A woman's German outfit. Jeanna was considering it.


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The cuckoo clock I actually wanted. The antlers really made the clock.


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I liked this one too as it had beer drinking men on the front as well as dancers on the top.


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Damien walking through the tunnels at Marienplatz U-bahn station. I just liked the crazy orangeness
of the tiles. Yes, yes, I was definitely hung over.


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So, where's the next stop? More beer I say! We went back to Oktoberfest, and if you can believe it
along with beer tents, there is also a full-scale amusement park. Just looking at this ride almost
made me hurl, and not in the Irish sense.


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The front of this cafe had moving guys on it. One of them looked like a Mr Potato Head.


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The calf warmers are actually more ridiculous than Bermuda shorts and socks pulled up.


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People have all kinds of things on their heads. I think this guy must have been a U of S Agro.


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Jeanna, with a chicken on head. Yes, that's right, a chicken.


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They have roving women with breathalyzers at Oktoberfest. I thought, "Oh cool, they're really
focused on safety..."


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Nope, they just want to congratulate you for how drunk you are. Way to go Jeanna - 0.133! Check
the bottom of this page for a video of it. They even give you a certificate.


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Jeanna was still playing the game trying to get her picture taken with German men in costume.


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Pussy met this young lady named Astrid (I think it might have been Asterix though...). Apparently, he
immediately fell in love and proceeded to plan their whole lives together. They would be wed shortly,
would have 3 children and their first one would be named Paul, after the Paulaner tent they met in.
Yeah, Pussy, nice work not noticing the big boyfriend right behind her...


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Pussy thought he had a nicer bum that Asterix did. Can you guess who is who?


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Jeanna and Alan are too cool for school. I could tell that Jeanna was getting drunk since she would
start to lift her leg when we'd take her photo.


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Damien scored this sweet hat that became our drinking hat for the rest of the festivities. He sadly
lost it before he took it home, but we have many memories in digital photos.


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This fat guy deserved a photo due to his Hawaiian shirt and bad moustache. The only way to make this
photo better is to insert me into it, or if the guy had a mullet.


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Jeanna and Astrid. Hey Pussy, that's more lovin' than you got!


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Even Damien got in on the action.


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Damien and Jeanna.


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This is a monkey on the guy's head. Seriously.


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I can't even speculate on what's going on in this photo.


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Pussy and I hanging out.


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I bought the table a cookie to try out the gingerbread to see if it was worthy to bring
home to Natalia. It was actually quite good.


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Hmm, which one's better - "Alan, eat your heart out!" or, "Alan's got a bite on Jeanna's heart"?


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Jeanna kissing a random Italian guy.


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These were actually the original steins back in the day. I think the ceramic ones are cooler than
the glass ones.


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Jeanna and more Italian friends.


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The five musketeers making a late exit from the Paulaner tent.


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I love that Jeanna is making the devil horns while riding Pussy's back.


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Alan and Damien in front of the giant female statue.


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Alan, being a poser back at the Holiday Inn - our home for the weekend.


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Jeanna and Alan rocking out.


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There are a lot of hand gestures here. I'm just going to say that one of them means,
"ZE PEANUTS ARE FOR ZE EATING NOT FOR ZE THROWING!"


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Hello FAE training 2009! That's how marketing helps out the field... Alan M being
"helped" by Pussy O'Brien.


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M pulling a pint of draft for the boys. I can't believe the barmaids at our hotel.
They let us hang out and be retarded until sometime after 5am.

Day 3 - The Silliness


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Jeanna and I had an agenda on our last day there since I wanted to find a cuckoo clock. We went
back to Marienplatz and wandered a little trying to find a clock I liked better than the ones
we saw on our first tour the day before. This is us proving that we did moderately more than
just drink beer while in Munich.


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I damn near bought a pair of these. I think they'd make great biking shorts...


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This is my clock. It should be here any day now.


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This is where I got Natalia's cookie from. I guess it's a German tradition to go around
drinking beer while wearing a big gingerbread around your chest.


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These are the two cookies that made it through a night of drinking around my neck and four flights
home so that Natalia could also enjoy the gingerbread.


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This is me drinking beer and wearing the cookie. It was actually really difficult protecting the
from drunks falling on it, as well as drunks trying to eat it.


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Jeanna and the band inside the Lowenbrau.


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The guy in the sweater next to Dave looks awesome. He should be on "The Office".


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These two started having a standing arm wrestling match.


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This guy apparently loves big German men with no shirts.


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The standing arm wrestling match turned into a seated one with no shirts on. Wow, is all I have to say.
Neither one of these guys were very coherent, but they definitely needed to arm wrestle. The match
was over in about half a second though.


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Jeanna enjoying a home rolled cigar with Katie, who found us again from the previous night.


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Another one for Paul's awesome sign collection.


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M is making friends with the winner of the arm wrestling match.


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This guy totally wanted to make out with Dave.


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Jeanna with ANOTHER picture for the contest. Note that the leg is making its way back up again...


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Jeanna bought herself a sweet cookie as well.


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So, what's the best idea to do after you've been drinking?? ROLLER COASTER!!


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Unbelievably, the cookie made it too.


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The Alpina Bahn rocked out for us!

I love taking my phone out drinking if only to take memos of ridiculousness.
Before the videos, here are a few quotes from my phone memo pad:
Title - Gay in German
Schwuler - gay man
Lesbich - gay woman
Pussy - Maurice

"There's nothing like a warm pair of jox" - Pussy O'Brien
"No roofies, no semen, or gowl-juice" - Jeanna Berg referring to her beer as she heads to the loo
"Hail to the county of Cock" - Jeanna Berg
"Ze nuts are for ze EATING not for ze throwing!" - barmaid at the Holiday Inn
"Jeanna, keep the gowl-juice off the hat." - M
"When you wake up in the morning and you're not dead and you have your passport, the rest is details. " - M
"I'm a gash man, not a ghee man. " - M
"My entry with the two gay lads was right up there." - Pussy

Videos

Our German friend Daniel explaining how a Japanese says the name of the beer we're drinking: VIDEO

Random table dancing at Hakkor Pshorr with Daniel and his wife: VIDEO

Jeanna and Daniel dancing on a table. Daniel has sweet liederhosen: VIDEO

The original Glockenspiel in Munich and the reason I bought a cuckoo clock: VIDEO

Jeanna explaining the Alcoholics Unanimous team: VIDEO

Jeanna's breathalyzer results after 2 L of Oktoberfest beer: VIDEO

I don't know why but Germany loves the White Stripes: VIDEO

In fairness, as we're drinking in the Holiday Inn bar: VIDEO

We are definitely NOT the Beatles: VIDEO

More table dancing at the Lowenbrau: VIDEO

We are definitely the "Champions": VIDEO

That seems like a fitting way to complete our epic tale of madness, craziness, and silliness.

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